This is what happens when you get caught speeding!

You get a letter from the police and straight away your heart drops and you're thinking 'shit, what have I been caught doing?'

Then you realise you've been caught speeding.  Your next thought is 'shit, points on my licence and a £60 fine'


You feel like to screwing up that letter and dashing it hard at the wall but before you do that if you keep reading you will see a little bit below that they are offering a way to get out of the points.

Basically provided you have been caught doing no more than the speed limit plus 10% plus an extra 9mph, you get the option of doing a speed awareness course instead of the points.  Example: on a 30mph road as long as you were doing less than 42mph (30mph +10% =33mph, +9 =42mph).

Surprise surprise this course is not free in fact they want even more money from us (£93) and 4 hours of our life!  If you need your licence for your job then this is your only real option.

Anyway I did this course so I thought I would let the man dem know what its all about.  I'm a man who likes to speed so I went there thinking let me just get through this 4 hour bullshit of being lectured at and made to watch videos of crash victims etc. But you know what? I'm glad I did it as I actually learned a few things and it wasn't about scare monger tactics at all.  No intense driving course either though (or any driving) for those of us hoping we got taught how to speed properly!

Did you know that in an emergency if you ring 999 they can only locate your actual location to a few miles of where you are?  that delay finding you if you had an accident on a country road that you didn't know where you need the ambulance asap could easily cost you your life.  However if you rang 112 instead it pings your exact location to within meters of where you are.

Did you know that only 4% of all crashes happen on the motorway and only 7% of all deaths from crashes happen on the motorway?

These are just some of the things I learned.  I won't tell you everything or you won't feel like you got your money's worth when you do it yourself!  Basically it wasn't a complete waste of a Sunday morning and my hard earned money.

How many man dem have done this course and did you learn anything?

VIDEO: Show me the BOOBS!

Yeah I'd say I agree with a lot of this.  It's simple we like to look at titties so don't spoil it.

VIDEO: Guy does amazing slamdunk... of HIMSELF!

ohhhhhhh shit... air time!

Sweet Brown - Ain't Nobody Got Time For that - Remix!

>>More Videos<<

VIDEO: This lazy dad has found a new way to use the hoover

Record breaking hair combing skills...

Does WILL.I.AM like WILL.E or not?

In this photo he is clearly undecided about something, but is it his sexuality?

This one has baffled us for years, admit it. Don't get us wrong we don't mind either way - its 2013 to bumba. We just would like to know (yes because we're nosy).

You never hear about him with any other girl other than Cheryl do you?

Yes agreed everyone has a right to their private life but no-one that high profile can be so good at keeping their life private unless they really had something they wanted to hide.

He is a legend and a very talented individual, you all know there is at least one Black eyed peas song that you love no matter what type of music your into. Everyone likes the guy and would take him either way (no pun intended) so why all the secrecy?

I tried looking for some pictures of him looking less camp but it was a real challenge and this was the best I could find

Finding photos of him that looked gay didn't prove quite so difficult...

This is not a witch hunt or a post hating on gays so we don't want negativity just want to know.

Out of interest, what do the man dem think?

(Dee)

Is there such thing as an iron liver? Guy downs big ass bottle of Absolut Vodka

We seem to see a lot of people out there dropping photos on Facebook/Instagram etc. drinking a bottle of something when they're out in the club.

You need to stop with the slobbering over the bottle unless you're gonna drink the thing. Introducing the man who can show all the wannabe celebs how to back a drink.

This man here takes a full bottle of Absolut Vodka (That's 40%) and down's it like water.

I've heard all kinds of rumours like "he's dead now" and "he was in hospital for weeks after" etc. Anyone actually know what's going on with this guy?

 

$3 million at a bus stop behind 3M Security Glass. What do you do?

This is a real situation which happened a while back. 3 million dollars was set up behind some glass, the challenge was simple - break the glass and the money is yours!

Sounds too good to be true right?

Apparently this was set up to show just how strong the 3M security glass was. How better to prove it than to let some passers by try and kick the shit out of it in hope of being a bus stop millionaire?


After looking a bit deeper into this I found that you were only allowed to only use your feet to break it which is why you can see people trying WWE drop kicks on it.

Anyway take a look at some of these guys trying their best to get that money.

Can you imagine what's going though these guys heads, the desperation thinking that they're gonna be a millionaire for kicking down some glass at a bus stop?

Were any of you there trying to kick your way to financial freedom?

Realistically no one is even coming close to kicking down that glass, check this guy going at some of the same type of glass with a hammer...

KFC kidney brain surprise. What is actually under the breadcrumbs?

We love home cooked seasoned chicken as much as the next man but every now and then a few dirty pieces of chicken from KFC is just what is needed.

But no fuckin way did we mean this!

Seriously? WTF would you do if you found that in your box ...after you had bit into it?

Well a man did find this according to The Sun newspaper.

They say it's not a brain its only a kidney. I would KICK OFF regardless.

Has this put the man dem off eating at KFC?

(Dee)

VIDEO: Super human speed at play!

This guy Carlin Isles was (and obviously still is) a top sprinter.  Watch him give Rugby a try, he is unstoppable!

VIDEO: Crazy Russians doing exercises on a high tower

Mad motherfuckers!

VIDEO: Giraffes use their necks like axes to fight each other

Holy shit! I always thought giraffes were the pussies of the jungle. Not when they're fighting over a female... these giraffes go at it HARD!

VIDEO: Guy in Ghostbusters suit back flips over police officers

He could have outrun the chubby fuckers too...

Do you get the feeling you are being pressured into marriage?

You’ve been with your girl for a few years now, you might even have one or two kids with her.

Now that’s real commitment right?  You’ve got kids together, you live together, you LOVE each other!

What more can she need?

She wants that fucking ring on that finger and there’s no getting round it.

Her parents and her ‘already married’ friends are always asking her… ‘so then do you think you two will get married or what?'

You turn the TV on and there’s nothing but extra pressure coming from the TV!

You turn the radio on and you get no help there either!  …With Beyonce's 'Wuh uh oh you should have put a ring on it' bullshit.

Then there's Twitter and Facebook, you know she wants this the most!

You can fight it for so long, we know the excuses (and here are the best ones just incase you need them);

• Babes as soon as I have enough money to give you the wedding that you deserve we’ll start planning it but money is tight at the moment
• We don’t need a piece of paper to show we love each other, we're stronger than that.
• Most marriages end in divorce so lets not ruin what we have
• I wanna do a surprise proposal but when you keep mentioning it it just delays me doing it!

If you have used all of them up then I’m afraid it’s time to hand that card in
and just accept it.

Why do the man dem fight the wedding ring so hard?

(Dee)

Apparently it's 'Black girls put out or lose out'

‘Why do a lot of Black men prefer White women?’

This question has been asked or even just wondered so many times!

We asked the man dem for your feed back on this, so thanks for all your responses.

There is no single answer so here are the top 5 answers that we received from you.

What are your thoughts on these?

1) White women are less confrontational and basically will put up with more shit in general than black women meaning there are less arguments and physical confrontations.

2) White women are more likely to wanna please you in bed, they are generally more open and willing to experiment sexually than most black women.  Most black women don’t want to free it up and take a conservative approach in the bedroom (basically getting head from a black girl takes Jedi mind tricks or a gold band around her wedding finger), although there are some of exceptions.

3)  Having sex with a white woman is revenge or payback on white males for the historical, daily and future racism that black males endure in all walks of life in the UK, America and even globally.

4) UK men and Americans of all races are raised on the same European standard of beauty so men of all races are conditioned (by media etc) to find white women attractive.

5) Many black women are out of shape and don’t do anything about it, using the line that a real man wants more to hold on to (yes having something to hold is good however not wanting to look at you without your clothes on is bad).


We encourage the Man Dem to go with whatever race you like –black, white, yellow or any other colour you like. At the end of the day it’s no-one else’s business.

Man dem do agree or is this bulshit?

(Dee)

My girlfriend is so dam sexy when she strips! ...but

Question from Donavan;

My girlfriend is so hot and I'm talking proper hot. 

Pretty and innocent face but where you can tell she can be a right dirty bitch if she wanted (which she is!) She has perfect D cup titties -the type that hold you in a trance when she pops them out of her bra and they stay exactly where they were. Smooth long legs and her ass is so peachy its ridiculous! 


She drives a fat Range Rover, has plenty of money and loves giving me head.

My problem is though...
She's a stripper/exotic dancer and gets fully naked and dances for anyone who pays hers in the club that she works at.  Other men are getting to see my girls private parts which I want to be for my eyes only.  

I met her in her club so I know guys she really flirts with the guys in order to earn more money and that she can take phone numbers with ease.

Am I being stupid to expect my girl not fuck one of them rich footballers offering her all sorts.  Its making me want to check her phone whenever she's not looking.  It is making me resent her and turn into a undercover jealous psycho.   

Should I try and make her change job?

The Man Dem response;

Sounds like your living many men's dreams -fucking a fit stripper whenever you like for FREE!! So stop moaning and go give her one for me.   No not really we can appreciate the obvious difficulty that comes with this type of relationship.

You clearly are punching above your weight in terms of looks and that is why you are putting up with feeling like shit at home while she is out rubbing her 'perfect titties' in other men's faces.  You met her as a stripper and I'm guessing she makes good money to be driving that car so trying to get her to change jobs might just get you the boot (and not the bootie), unless you can replace her earnings?

However if you feel it is changing you as a person and your not happy then we suggest you talk to her about how you feel, but remember self pity and insecurity is not a good look and very attractive so take the 'your better than this now' approach rather than 'I'm a jealous and broke man, please don't look at other guys'

How to tell when you're being lied to, and how to be a better liar

Yep, we’ve all been lied to and at the time we had no idea.

Maybe it was your girlfriend, your so called friend or even just a work colleague. And we’ve all lied too!

Here are the top tell tale signs for The Man Dem to identify a liar (or become a better one!).

• A person who is lying to you will avoid making eye contact or try to make their body face a different direction. In fact they'll pretty much be looking anywhere but your eyes.

• Liars touch their face, throat & mouth when accused. And not in the sexy way (unless they are trying to silence your accusations with sex).

• If they say something like "you look nice" but pulling the face like someone farted in a lift, guess what - they're probably lying.

• Fake smiles - you know, the smile that you'd use in a job interview. Only the mouth moves but the rest of the face tells a different story.

• A guilty person gets defensive e.g. "you trying to say I've been fucking every person I meet?" No, mother fucker just your work friend.

• A liar might unconsciously place objects between themselves and you. As if you'd need to climb over that coffee cup on the table to get to them.

• The guilty person may speak more than normal, adding adding extra words or details. Suddenly they can remember how many sets of traffic lights they passed on their route to the 'gym'.

• To catch someone out you can try changing the conversation quickly. A liar follows along willingly (damn right!) and becomes more relaxed. An innocent person may be confused by the sudden change in topics and will want to go back to the original subject.

Congratulations, you are now qualified human lie detector.

The Man Dem empowering the man dem.  You're welcome.

Who will you catch out with your new power?

Help me satisfy my man! What should I be doing down there?

Question from Louisa;

Ok 'The Man Dem' I am a woman wanting your help! I have been told that I give crap head. 

When I saw that Tulisa video of her doing it I actually thought she was good but everyone has slated her for how bad she was. 

What makes a good bj?
Man Dem response;

Well done for for having the balls to ask and not just carry on giving unsatisfying and even painful head. Teeth out the way is number one in my books. Number two is..., actually I'll just let the Man Dem get involved in answering this one (below in the comments) or you will only know what I like -which is still not a bad idea ;-)

Man dem this is your chance, tell her how you like it.

(Dee)

How many FAKE kisses should we do?

Question from Dave;

When I see certain friends especially some old college friends that I haven't seen in a while, I go to say hello and they are leaning in for the kiss. 

But its not even a real kiss on the cheek its like an air kiss! And then some people fake kiss just one side and then some people do both sides?

I'm never sure what to do, what should us man dem do?



Response from the Man Dem;

This one has been pissing me off me for ages so I'm glad you brought it up Jay (See you even get a name check for this one).

I can't stand gyal that do that! (i'm assuming its girls you're talking about?). Firstly why do they try and go on like their posh with that lardy dar business like their not the same person you saw at college begging friends or was even begging a sub for lunch money.  Secondly why the air kiss? if your gonna do the whole kiss thing then actually kiss my cheek -I am clean. Thirdly kissing both sides is just being extra.

My advice to all the man dem facing this problem is that when this happens again and they give you the air kiss, you say 'Sorry I didn't hear you can you say it again.  I thought you were kissing my cheek but when I didn't feel anything I realised you wasn't'  so that they have to explain their stupid action and hopefully stop doing it.

If any of the man dem have any other solutions or opinions on this then lets here it.

(Dee)

test post 1

Recommended: Torch to knock an intruders lights out

Recommendation:

How many times have you heard a noise outside and gone to the door with a baseball bat to deal with the potential intruder? Okay probably not that many times if at all but I know you've spoke about it.

Well with this bad boy you don't even need to reach for your torch light and your bat. 2 in 1 baby!

Need to go out in the dark for something? Your light buddy is right with you, ready to guide you on your way or knock a man the hell out.

I don't know where to suggest you get these from because the sites I've seen have got different variations, prices and locations so you can do your own research. Here's a picture to give you an idea of size:

"Oi mate, you got a light" yeah, in your fucking temple

I think I'm sold, Now hurry up and take my money...

VIDEO: Fighter thinks his chin is made of iron - gets KTFO

You ever watched one of those movies where the tough guy lets someone punch the shit out of him and is not affected? Well here is one of those guys... not! Where the hell does the superhero come from at 0:45?

 

VIDEO: Slow motion punches to the face!

Ever wanted to see what a face looks like after it's been punched? Then check this out! Skip to the 1 minute mark if you want to get to the punches!
Now check out this guy who thinks he has an iron chin!

VIDEO: Bruce Lee Bossing Ping Pong (using nunchakus!)

I wanna believe this is real, so all you know it all's can do one.

VIDEO: Speed boat -Fail!

This video is weirdly addictive!

You don't look so cool in them shades after that face plant do you!

White guy imitates punjabi song - people think it's racist

I'm sure by now you've all seen the viral video of the white guy who tries to sing the popular song by Panjabi MC - Mundian To Bach Ke (you know, the song with the Knightrider sample) as it's done it's rounds.

Some people are suggesting that his attempt was racist.

I got jooookkkke!

But can this be considered racist? Is it really any different to mumbling along the a tune you don't really know the words to in a language that you speak?

This guy seems like he loves the tune, his neck is even going for it. For those who haven't seen the video (have you been hiding under a rock?) here it is. Let us know what you think.

~C

Call of Duty - video games preparing children for war?

Boom! Headshot! Use the claymores! Call in an airstrike! Any of this stuff familiar to Call of Duty fans?

Call of Duty and Battlefield video games seem to be even more popular than every these days. We've got 10 year olds flying helicopters leading a team into battle talking about weapons I've never even heard of. And they go crazy for this shit.

Does anyone else wonder though whether it is a simple game or whether there is an overall objective of making war seem normal, even fun in the hope that some people will join the forces and serve their country on the front line?

Back in the day you had adverts like this:

But times have changed and a simple poster? Nah that's not good enough to recruit the next generation of killing machines. How about creating a game based on killing and becoming a hero so when they do finally join they'll fit in nicely.

In fact, how about making the controls for a Challenger 2 Battle Tank very similar to a Playstation controller?

Yep, check the similarities between a real tank controller and a Playstation controller.

Obviously playing a game isn't going to prepare a kid for war but surely it will feed a kid with enough of a buzz to think how exciting it could be to really be out there, the same way kids get a good feeling associated with eating a Mc Donalds happy meal (because they get a 'free' toy).

My opinion is that most definitely - yes this is a way to recruit youngsters to be future soldiers, after all, if you throw enough mud at a wall some will stick.

What do you think?

~C

Can we win the lottery or is it fixed?

Everyone wants to be a lottery winner. But money can't make you happy, right? "Bullshit Mr Han Man" I'll take that chance.

How many times have you spent your imaginary lottery winnings in your head, talked about quitting your job and what you would say (or do) to your boss, the cars you would buy and the holidays you would go on?

I read a story a while back about about one country's lottery being investigated (can't remember the details, if anyone does please let us know) so I'm thinking if one countries lottery can be fixed why can't ours?

One scam is meant to run like this: super computers keep track of each combination sold, and then the ping-pong balls are weighted to assure that a losing combination comes up (hello double roll overs). On rare occasions, all possible combinations are sold, and they must let someone win. Only then is the game honest.

I've never met anybody who has won the lottery (proving it's a fix right) or met anyone who has won a substantial amount of money. Have you?

There are a load of conspiracy sites out there and to be honest I can believe it's a fix and I've heard people refer to the lottery as 'the poor man's tax'.

What do the rest of the man dem think. Fixed or not?

~C

Your child needs YOU more than you realise

Too many boys nowadays do not know what it means to be a man, how can they -they don’t have a man in their lives.

Kids on your street will go to bed tonight without saying goodnight to their Dad because he simply isn’t there.

Maybe even your kid?

There are now over two million single parent families in Britain. The vast majority are headed by a mother, meaning that millions of kids are being raised in households where there is no father. (The figures, from the Office for National Statistics, showed that more than one in four families – 26% – are now led by a single parent.)

Nearly one-fourth of America’s children live in mother-only families. Out of the families living in Hamilton county, 39% of them are headed by a single mother. Of the children living with their mothers, 35% never see their father and 24% see their fathers less than once a month. These kids no doubt live with a woman, and they are taught by a woman at school. Where do they see and interact with positive male role models? If kids is a boy how do they learn what it means to be a man? ...TV? ...Movies? ...On the street?

Even in homes where the father are there research shows that the average father spends less than 10 minutes a day one-on-one with his child. We are living in a society where emotional and spiritual fatherlessness is becoming the norm. Many of today’s fathers did not have positive role models to show them what it means to be a father to a child, so they are not there to show their children what it means to be a father.

No matter how good a mother is, she can't replace what you as a father provides to a child. Irrefutable research shows that mothers typically are nurturing, soft, gentle, comforting, protective and emotional. Dads (myself included) tend to be challenging, prodding, loud, playful, encourage risk taking, and physical. Children need a balance of protection and reasonable risk taking.

If a positive male role model is not present in the life of a child there is a void in this area. Children who live in this environment are more likely to be involved in criminal activity, underage sexual activity, do poorer in school and therefore not have the same chance in adult life as kids with more balanced influences.

Studies have shown that involvement of a father or a positive male role model in the lives of children has profound effects on them. Father-child interaction promotes a child’s physical well being, perceptual ability and competency for relating with others.
These children also demonstrate greater ability to take initiative and show self-control.

How can you make a positive difference for these children?

• If you are a mother you can encourage the involvement of positive male role models in the life of your child.

• If you are a dad who doesn’t live with your yout then you can make the effort to visit with your child more often and be intentional about teaching them important life lessons.

• If you are an teacher you can encourage dads to take on a more active role in the classroom.

• If you are a positive male role model you can involve yourself in the lives of children in your community who can benefit from your influence.

• If you are a leader in your business encourage your employees to be involved in community efforts such as mentoring, sports or activity coaches, Boy Scouts, Girl Scouts, youth groups, Boys Club or Girl’s Inc.


Too many of us could have wrote this post from our own experience but it doesn’t have to be like that for the kids of today.

Man Dem are you doing your bit?

So what's the deal with black people bleaching their skin?

Throughout 2012 we heard rumours about certain black celebrities who had bleached their skin.

In South Africa a study in the University of Cape Town identified that about 1 woman in every 3 bleaches their skin? What the fuck is happening?

It's a sad thing that even in this day and age some black people can be so unhappy with their skin colour that they would go to the extremes of using potential cancer creating creams.

These creams have been known to cause blood cancers like leukemia, liver and kidney cancer and potentially a severe skin condition called ochronosis (which basically turns your skin purple, defeating the purpose of actually bleaching your skin).

Some celebrities suspected of skin bleaching:

Rihanna

Has she bleached or is the image on the right the result of make-up/lighting?

Vybz Kartel

Admitted skin bleaching, in fact is looking to launch his own skin bleaching products (the man looks dead).

Beyonce

Bleached skin? Or a photoshop for Loreal advertising?

Don't get me wrong, nearly everybody changes their natural appearance in some way, whether it's hitting the gym like a beast, putting on thick layers of make up, wearing padded bras or hair extensions, but isn't bleaching your skin a bit too far? I think so, especially with the associated risks with using the products.

What do you think?

~C

VIDEO: Hero stops man from beating up his woman

This guy is about to beat the crap out of his woman. Not with this superhero around...

VIDEO: Female FAIL Collection 2012

Look at these girls doing their thing for the camera. Everyone likes to show off every now and again and capture that moment on camera to show their childrem, and their childrems children and all that.

Well These girls took it one step further and FUCKED UP. Bitch, youz on camera...